Not So Guilty Pleasures

While I was part of the working world I had this guilty pleasure – reading. I have always loved to read but I always used to sneak away to read. Outside in a tree as a little kid, in the library as a middle school kid (not doing my homework) and in the middle of the night as an adult. I was sneaking around, shirking my responsibilities, procrastinating.  To escape into a different world, meet people (or vampires), solve crimes, fight dragons, see the pyramids, laugh out loud and fall in love – how could I resist! I could not. So I continued to sneak around and read when I could. Vowing that when I retired reading was going to be part of my daily “to do” list.

Then I retired! And now I read at least 3 to 4 hours every day and sometimes more. NO more guilt about the pleasures of reading. I’d love to be able to tell you that I read all these great books – classics, the great minds, self-improvement, politics, but that is not what I am reading. Instead, I am reading mystery, romance, and my top favorite of the moment – urban fantasy.

What – you say – is that? Urban fantasy is a subgenre of fantasy, placing supernatural elements in an approximation of a contemporary urban setting. The combination provides the writer with quixotic plot-drivers, unusual character traits, and a platform for classic fantasy tropes, without demanding the creation of an entirely imagined world. Think Anne Rice with Vampires in New Orleans. But there is so much more.

Some people have difficulty suspending belief but really there are amazing things out in the world. Things that are really had to believe – why can’t there be magic or magick, as the case may be. And I am pretty sure I know some people who are vampires, werewolves and witches. There is no doubt that at least one person is a demon. If you already know urban fantasy, I don’t have to tell you. If you have never tried it, give it a shot – it really is fun.

I started with a series (I love series) by Mark Hayden. His The Thirteenth Witch, grabbed me from the beginning when the hero Conrad, former RAF pilot and alleged gangster, receives a text (yes, text message) from The Allfather (Odin). Over 17 books we learn about a whole cast of characters so complex that Mark’s website has several “who’s who’ lists and a family chart. I have referred to them many times. These books are absolutely tongue in cheek and the cast of characters are amazing, almost all with a serious flaw or two. One of my favorites is a talking mole. What can I say, you just must read it to understand.

More great stories in The Invisible Library Series by Genevieve Cogman. Irene is a professional spy for the mysterious Library, which harvests fiction from different realities. Along with her enigmatic assistant Kai, she’s posted to an alternative London. Their mission – to retrieve a dangerous book. But when they arrive, it’s already been stolen, London’s underground factions seem prepared to the very death to find her book. Did I mention that Kai is a dragon – and yes – spoiler alert – he does turn into one occasionally. The real story throughout the 8-book series however is the balance of power in the universe between chaos (represented by the Fae) and order (represented by Dragons). The Library and their employees help to keep the balance – sort of. This is mystery, intrigue and yes, a little love story all combined.

There is nothing I like better than humor and maybe a little snarkiness. One of the funniest series I have read is by K.F. Breene called of all things Demigods of San Francisco Series – I suspect it was better that I not know that until after I read the first book – Sin & Chocolate. Great title – right? Who could not read that? A paranormal romance series with a heavy dose of Greek mythology. This series focuses on Alexis, a ghost whisperer with teen-aged adopted kids and includes some of the trials of single parenthood. Heavy on humor and magic, the romance is slower to start but becomes a big part of the story by book two. Lots of sex, lots of banter, lots of emotions are at play. Lexi picks up a whole host of characters who can help her fight the evil forces at play in San Francisco and the world. Honestly some of the “battles” are completely laugh out loud.

I could go on and on about all the great Urban Fantasy I have read over the past couple of years but then I would be writing a novel myself. Here are a few great authors for you to check out.

Jennifer Estep – The Elemental Assassin books – Gin Blanco who controls the elements of Ice and Stone. She is an assassin and the owner of a barbeque joint.

Dan Willis – The Arcane Casebook series – This book follows a Detective / Rune wright Alex as he solves crimes and fights Nazi’s in 1930s NYC. The city is controlled by Sorcerers who are not so strangely like the captains of industry from that time.

Linsey Hall – I love literally everything this woman writes – she was an archaeologist who studied shipwrecks and that love of historical objects comes through in this series. She has Magical towns set all over with reoccurring characters throughout her novels.

C.N. Crawford – These two authors (Christine and Nick) who write lots of books. I have read most of them and love them all. Some of these books have great battle scenes. I often wonder if this is because it had both a female and male perspective?

There are a whole lot more great authors in this genre. If you would like to know more authors just contact me or try google. If you have an urban fantasy author, you like – please post!

BTW – some of these Urban Fantasies are heavy on sex, so if that is not you, you might want to read the fine print.

The Journey Begins

The start of a trip is always filled with anxiety. Have I packed everything? Did I water the plants? What did I miss? But after your first flight takes off you settle into travel mode. Relax – deal with the travel issues. The first flight is late but no worries – there is a six hour layover before the flight to London. The good news is there is a business class lounge that is calling your name.

You start to relax and now you know you are on a trip. A glass of wine, some lunch and relaxing as the time passes.

I don’t get a chance to travel business class often but I have to say I could get used to this. They really take care of you. You feel like you are among the elite. Seriously you can take a shower here.

The trick with travel is to lean into it. There is nothing you can do about airline flights. It is really a crap shoot as to what happens. You just have to trust that everything will work out and the airline gods are with you.

I’m the mean time it’s fun to people watch. Who are these fellow travelers? You have come together in this one instance of connection. What are there stories? There is a family – grandparents and kids where are they off too? A man desperately trying to change his flight to make a connection. Young, old all thrown together in this moment of this particular day. Each of us with our own stories and our own experiences, but here today, thrown together, having these moments together. It binds us we are connected. If only for the moment. This is why I love to travel! Let’s hope those airline gods are with us, if not, let’s have another glass of wine.

The End of 2021

May you live in interesting times – A Chinese Proverb

2021 has been a weird year. But at least it was a year, unlike 2020 which just wasn’t. Even the start of the year was weird – a new President had been elected – or had he? There were those who believed that there was massive voter fraud – of course there wasn’t. Then on January 6th – insurrection at the Capitol! It was surreal watching thugs charge in, the Congress whisked out and no one making any real effort to stop it. The destruction and terror was real and it was simply hard to believe it was happening in the USA. Through some miracle it settled down and we were able to inaugurate a new President. The issue is that there are a lot of people at opposite ends of the political spectrum. The division in the country was and is palpable. What’s happened to civil discourse and compromise? 2021 was certainly not the year for that.

Then there’s the elephant in the room – COVID. Early in 2021, we thought we had it under control. A vaccine was available, people were getting it and the numbers were going down. We started seeing people again, we went out to lunch and dinner. I was back at the office full time. Then, Delta struck. Now of course we are in the throws of Omicron. God only knows what’s next! Again, COVID seems to be fueling the division in the country. There are the anti-vaxers, the anti- maskers and the people who believe it is all a conspiracy. Not to be too nasty, but the up side to that is that all those folks are dying quicker than those of us who are vaccinated. Unfortunately, I think we just have to learn to live with Covid. I will not spend the rest of my life with out seeing family and friends. Without travelling. Without doing the things I really want too. I WILL however be wearing a mask and getting boosters.

My personal year was weird too. Heck, I did last New Year’s Eve with friends via Zoom. I was one of a handful of people “in the office” at the start of the year, but by July most people were back in the office, at least part time . Once I was fully vaccinated, I did decide that I was no longer isolating myself. I started to see people, go over to friends houses, have lunch and dinner out and go to the movies. I remember the first time I heard live music I almost cried. Sometimes, a good pandemic can remind you of the things that are really important in your life.

I also became a part of “The Great Resignation”. I just got tired of dealing with all the stress of work and retired. Life is short and I wanted to devote the rest of mine to having fun! So far its working out pretty well. I’m getting in shape, organizing my house, playing piano, reading more, seeing old friends more and meeting new people. I am also getting very well versed in binge watching streamed channels. (If you haven’t seen Ted Lasso or The Beatles: Get Back you really need to) I’m also putting together a whole list to all the things I’ve ever wanted to do. It’s really long, but I can hardly wait to start working through it.

Happy New Year to All – here’s to a better 2022!

                                                                                                                          

FRUSTRATION

“To conquer frustration, one must remain intensely focused on the outcome, not the obstacles.”
― T.F. Hodge

Maybe its because I am an only child, or maybe its some kind of personality flaw – but I really like getting my own way. I get really frustrated when, for whatever reason, things don’t work out the way I want them to. I rant, I rave and I obsess over the problem. This, of course only makes it worse.

The latest frustration has been my car. In June, I stupidly ran into a wall that I didn’t see. Really did a number on the car scrapping the whole passenger side. Everything worked, but it looked like hell.

So I did what anyone would do, I filed an insurance claim. Took the car to a collision shop and picked up a rental car. No big deal – or at least that’s what I thought.

In July, I called the insurance company to find out how things were going and had no response. Then I called the collision shop, they recommended I come in. When I arrive the car was pulled apart and they told me that they thought the car would be totaled. WHAT?? How is that possible? I scraped the car, yes, but seriously, everything worked, the doors and windows opened and closed. It locked, it drove. Shocked, I cleaned out my car, took the license plates and left. Then I called the insurance company, AGAIN, asking them when they were going to tell me that the car was totaled. This time, not only did they call, they told me that was not correct. The car would be fixed – it would take a few weeks and they would continue paying for the rental until it was ready. OK I thought – seems to be working out. Little did I know how delusional this was.

This was the beginning of a lengthy and frustrating relationship with “Kate” my contact at the collision shop. I would get a note saying they thought they have all the parts and then the next day, “something else would come up”. Every time they took something apart something else was damaged. That would necessitate more calls to the insurance company to make sure they would pay. By the end of two months I was incredibly frustrated. Ranting and raving at anyone who would listen. While the insurance company and collision shop told me that they would pay for my rental until my car was completed, the car was not getting fixed. Everyone was sorry, but it wasn’t really helping to get my car fixed. Covid, supply chain problems, parts coming in broken, god only knows what else. The frustration continued to intensify.

Now I began going through the stages of grief. By August, I was livid. They could have built dozens of cars, maybe it would have been better if the car had been totaled. In September, I was resigned. By October, I had accepted that I would never see my car again. At least I could find humor in the texts from Kate – from September –“I have this as our number one priority in the shop.” From October, “I think we have all the parts.” From early November –“The last part will be in from the dealer today”. Two weeks later – the part came in broken. I did get some encouraging notes – “your car is painted and in reassembly, the dash is in and the glass is being reinstalled.” (Why was the dash out??) “Your car is basically assembled but we are waiting on moldings. There is no time line for their release.“ Release – were they being held captive somewhere? “If you want to come over and see your car, you are welcome. Everything is together, except the door.” I guess my car was finally out of the ICU. I did not go.

Finally five months, almost to the day, after I left it. I picked up my car! I hear that it has almost 50% new parts, its a bionic car now! It does look good and it felt good to be driving in the car that was mine!

So what’s the conclusion of all of this? I guess that frustration is just part of life and while you can rant and rave all you want sometimes you just have to accept it. It helps if you can maintain a sense of humor and of course its good if it all works out in the end. But I still don’t know why they took the dashboard out!

Every Ending is just a New Beginning

In less than a week I am going to retire. WOW – how the heck did I get here? Honestly, it seems like yesterday that I accepted my first job at a grocery story in Downers Grove, Illinois. But here it is 52 years later and I am leaving WXXI. WXXI is a PBS and NPR station in Rochester, NY. It has been my work home for the last 22 years. And what a time it has been.

It was not a very auspicious start when I began my career at WXXI on March 1. 1999. To begin with, the person who was supposed to train me was stuck in Las Vegas because of a blizzard. I was on my own with a staff who wanted to know what I was going to cook for dinner during “pledge drive”. (Cook?? I never cook) Pledge Drive? I had no idea what that meant. On Wednesday, March 3rd the “pledge drive” started. It meant doing live breaks on TV from 6:00 AM until 11:00 PM. (Hence the need for food! I ordered Pizza)) I had no idea what I was doing but, at least I had a Pledge Producer who knew what to do. Thursday, the snow started and didn’t stop. Friday, my pledge producer was called up by the National Guard to remove snow. Saturday I learned how to “pitch” on live TV, lock down a camera and answer phones all during the same break. There was so much snow that I did not think I would make it home, so I stayed overnight at the station because I had to be there early Sunday morning. I am guessing that I was not the first person to so this as there are numerous showers at the station – thank God! Well for the first two weeks I worked more that 80 hours a week. Each time I passed the CEO in the hall, he told me it would get better. Fortunately he was right.

News, music, education, entertainment, WXXI provides it all. Programming, producing, promoting, and communicating the WXXI staff are an amazing, passionate group of people working job to improve the Rochester community. It’s hard work, keeping 5 TV stations and 6 radio stations, up and running with great programming 24/7 – 365 days of the year. But these folks do it. And we have fun doing it!

then I have honed my fund raising and friend raising skills. I have has the opportunity to be a radio and TV “star”. I have spoken to thousands of people who either love or hate what we are doing. I have met lots of PBS stars. I have travelled the world with the WXXI Travel club. Every time I thought I was ready to leave. Our CEO came up with a new challenges for me. I took over the management of the receptionists, volunteers, events and auction. Then we did a capital campaign, then another campaign, finally the acquisition of The Little Theatre and City. It was fun and exciting, not only because of my amazing colleagues but because of our volunteers and donors.

Now I am ready to move on. I will miss the challenges and the opportunities that WXXI has presented. I will miss the people. But I have lots of things I want to do. Travel, read, write, take classes, see my grandchildren more, get more physically fit and who knows what else. I can hardly wait to see what the future brings!

Thoughts on Turning 65

I turned 65 last week and the biggest question I have is – how the hell did I get here? It seems like yesterday that I was playing in the sandbox with friends, learning how to ride a bike, going to high school, going to college and then WHAM – here I am 65!

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Here I am with my husband and son at my Birthday Party. I love having a bit of a party with my friends.

I certainly have had a few hard times in my life but for the most part what a great ride. I’ve done a lot traveling, I’ve had great and fulfilling jobs and I have tried to return that favor by volunteering when I can. I want to thank everyone who has shared this adventure with me. Now let me tell you a few of the things that I have learned (by way of some of my favorite quotes) throughout the years.

“The problem with resisting temptation is you may never get another chance.”                       – Laurence Peter

“When choosing between two evils, I always like to try the one I’ve never tried before.”   -Mae West

“Do, or do not. There is no ‘try’.” – Yoda

“If you don’t like something change it; if you can’t change it, change the way you think about it.”  Mary Engelbreit

“Everything will be all right in the end… if it’s not all right then it’s not yet the end.”    Sonny in The Best Exotic Marigold Hotel

“There is no passion to be found playing small – in settling for a life that is less than you are capable of living.”   Nelson Mandela

“You miss 100 percent of the shots you never take.” – Wayne Gretzky

“Destiny is not a matter of chance. It is a matter of choice. It is not a thing to be waited for, it is a thing to be achieved.” William Jennings Bryan (1860 – 1925)

 

 

One last thing – drink a lot of water!

Going to the Zoo

Family at zooI took my grandchildren to the zoo yesterday.  It was great and they had an opportunity to see animals that they will probably never see in the wild. They enjoyed it and so did I. I have been going to zoos as long as I can remember. My grandfather took me to Brookfield Zoo every Friday. I loved the bears ad at that time we were allowed to throw peanuts and marshmallows to them. My great-aunt lived practically next door to the zoo and the tradition after Thanksgiving dinner was to walk over and visit the animals. Where ever I have travelled I have visited zoos and aquariums with fascination and delight.

Lately however, as we learn more about the intelligence and capabilities of all species, I find myself wondering if these facilities are really good for society. So I did a little reasearch. As you might expect there are all kinds of answers.

Ethics of Zoos and Aquariums

I have always believed that Zoos foster conservation but in reading I think we can do a better job in promoting consevation and also make sure that the animals have a fulled life. One article by Barbara Smuts talked about the need to provide someplace to go and something to do for animals.

Finding companion animals for the zoo residents. I am a big fan of all the cable TV shows where animals of different species befriend each other and friends really DO make a difference. Perhaps finding more space and changing “exhibits” will reduce the boredom and finally putting in more active things to keep the animals occupied.

I like the idea of a zoo as a sanctuary for animals that are not able to be in the wild. FInding more open space and more things for the animals to do naturally sounds right to me. I do think that taking animals from the wild is a mistake, unless they are unable to survive. There are a bunch of large refuges for animals that have been rescued. I also think that more proactive teaching of conservation from the zoos is important, We still go to zoos to be entertained. I still want these animals to be able to live in the wild, but are we humans able to leave them alone to live?

I don’t have good answers to these questions, but I do think we need to keep asking them.

Happy Birthday to my Grandson!

No one tells you that one of the best parts about being a parent is the opportunity to be a Grandparent. It’s truly a wonderful thing. I am reflecting on this today, my grandson’s 3rd Birthday.

I remember the day well. My colleagues and I were traveling to Washington DC via car for a conference. As we started the journey, my son, Max, called to tell me that Rebecca was in labor. We drove all the way down to DC taking bets on the delivery time and weight.  I was nervous and anxious but excited. My son gave me a minute my minute commentary. As we pulled into the parking lot of the hotel Moe was born. I think Corinne won the pool.

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As soon as the conference was over I traveled to Brooklyn to see my brand new grandchild. He was and is amazing. A new hope for the future, a new opportunity to see a child grow, develop a personality, skills and quirks. It also put my son in a new position – PARENT! It has been equally amazing to watch as he navigates all the trials and tribulations of parenthood. what a joy being a grandparent is.

Oh I almost forgot – the BEST part is that you have all the good stuff. Playing, reading, watching, buying toys, and then you give them back to their parents when they are cranky! Happy Birthday Moe! Grandma loves you!

 

 

 

Happy 4th of July?

I have always loved celebrating the 4th of July. The parades, the fireworks and barbeques. But this year I am conflicted. I am PROUD to be an American, yet, I have never been more disappointed in my country.
What happened to the principles of freedom that we were founded on? We hold these truths to be self-evident, that all men are created equal, that they are endowed by their Creator with certain unalienable Rights, that among these are Life, Liberty and the pursuit of Happiness. Now you don’t have to tell me these were written by white men about landed white men. But for most of my life I have felt we were moving to true freedom. Civil rights, women’s rights, LGBTQI rights – all moving forward. But now we seemed to have stopped in our tracks and are now moving backward. WHY?
William Faulkner​ wrote – “We must be free not because we claim freedom, but because we practice it.”
 
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It’s because we took our eyes off the prize – that prize of freedom for all!  All of us who were activists have not been working hard enough to keep that forward movement. We stopped to rest on our laurels and look what happened. It’s seems as though now it’s OK to be racist or homophobic and for some reason we can separate families who are seeking freedom.

So perhaps today we should celebrate our freedom (?) by making it a goal to work to make sure everyone is free. To work toward true equality and freedom. Here are a couple of suggestions about things we can do TODAY.

Help get out the vote – http://www.rochestervoteralliance.org/

Fight Homophobia – http://www.gayalliance.org/

Fight Racism  – http://standagainstracism.org/

Protect a woman’s right to choose: https://www.plannedparenthood.org

Help with local refugees – https://www.rochesterrefugeenetwork.org/rrrs/

Perhaps if we use this 4th of July to practice freedom, next year we will have more to celebrate.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

The Longest Day of the Year

Today is the Summer solstice, the longest day of sunlight in the year. It’s my favorite day. It’s a great day for reflection and deep thoughts about life, but its an equally great day to get out and enjoy life. If you are a pagan this is an especially important holiday, but what is the solstice?

The summer solstice occurs during the hemisphere’s summer. This is the June solstice in the Northern Hemisphere and the December solstice in the Southern Hemisphere. Depending on the shift of the calendar, the summer solstice occurs some time between June 20 and June 22 in the Northern Hemisphere and between December 20 and December 23 each year in the Southern Hemisphere.The same dates in the opposite hemisphere are referred to as the winter solstice.

Summer solstice

One of my favorite years was 1989. It was the year I got to experience TWO summer solstices and NO winter solstice. In June 1989, Bill and I were waiting to meet Max, out son, who we were adopting from Paraguay. we spent the whole day getting his room ready. Painting wallpapering and putting in some carpeting. Then in December 1989, we met Max in Acunsion, Paraguay. One of the happiest days of my life. Being in the southern hemisphere, we experienced a 2nd summer solstice. We walked in the sun and watched Max start to crawl and had a fabulous dinner at what the Paraguayans thought was a ridiculously early hour – 8:30 PM. Here’s Max’s baby picture.

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Just another fun fact about the summer solstice –

Ever since the Earth has had liquid oceans and a moon, its rotation has been gradually slowing over time due to tidal friction. That means — over very, very long periods of time — the days have been getting steadily longer. About 4.5 billion years ago, it took the Earth just six hours to complete one rotation. About 350 million years ago, it took 23 hours. Today, of course, it takes about 24 hours. And the days will gradually get longer still.

Given that, you’d think 2018 would be the longest day in all of history. But while it’s certainly up there, it doesn’t quite take top honors.

That’s because tidal friction isn’t the only thing affecting Earth’s rotation; there are a few countervailing factors. The melting of glacial ice, which has been occurring since the end of the last ice age 12,000 years ago (and is now ramping up because of global warming), is actually speeding up Earth’s rotation very slightly, shortening the days by a few fractions of a millisecond. Likewise, geologic activity in the planet’s core, earthquakes, ocean currents, and seasonal wind changes can also speed up or slow down Earth’s rotation.

When you put all these factors together, scientists have estimated that the longest day in Earth’s history (so far) likely occurred back in 1912. That year’s summer solstice was the longest period of daylight the Northern Hemisphere has ever seen (and, conversely, the 1912 winter solstice was the longest night we’ve ever seen).

Eventually, the effects of tidal friction should overcome all those other factors, and Earth’s days will get longer and longer as its rotation keeps slowing (forcing timekeepers to add leap seconds to the calendar periodically). Which means that in the future, there will be plenty of summer solstices that set new records as the “longest day in Earth’s history.”